I heard this song for the first time four years ago. Almost exactly four years ago. This beautiful song that makes me cry.
“I called, You answered….
AND YOU CAME TO MY RESCUE
and I,I want to be where You are…”
I heard it in a desperate hill country, in a place filled with violence and poverty.
Filled with beautiful people, amazing mountains, and incredible culture (along with some questionable food).
A country with Erica Lisbeth, this darling girl pictured above, who lives in Imbabura province in Ecuador and attends a Christian & Missionary Alliance church. The very same Imbabura where the Otavalo natives were unreached and unfriendly to the Gospel. Until God called Evelyn Rychner.
God called Evelyn and gave her a heart for Imbabura. A big heart like the one carved into the mountains there by two landslides. Art at the hand of God is visible all over this place; in piles of spices in the markets, in the strains of familiar worship songs sung in the Quicheau language, and in the smile of a little girl who took her favorite sparkly sticker off her Bible, ripped it in half, and stuck the other half on my Bible.
{Praise God we get to worship together forever in Heaven! I can’t wait to give her another hug!}
Like Evelyn and so many before her and after her, God calls us to places on His heart, and writes them on our hearts.
He has rescued us. How can we not share that?
See it’s this reciprocal thing.
When we call, He answers us. And when He calls, I sure hope we answer Him yes.
No matter how weak we feel in the moment. He will give us the heart for it.
“Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, ‘Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?’
And I said, ‘Here am I. Send me!'”
Isaiah 6:8
You rescued us.
May we want to be where You are, Lord.
Have you sought God’s “travel plans” lately? Where is He that He wants you alongside Him?
Your own home? Downtown in your city? Or maybe even halfway around the world?
Hello lovelies! Just had to pop in this morning because I’m sitting here, listening to this song on repeat, nearly in tears, getting ready for the day. These lyrics are so my heart right now.
“When I have nothing to offer You except for brokenness, You lift me up.”
So I guess that means we have to offer Him our brokenness, much as I want to keep schlepping it around, heavy on my back, head down, steam-rolling my way through the woods to the nearest hermit cabin I can find.
“My God, I’ll trust You. I’ll find you on my knees.”
Let’s share a cup of hot cocoa tonight, yeah? See, I made you a special one with homemade whipped cream, peppermint bits, and a cherry Andes mint. It’s rather delicious, if I do say so myself.
But it’s definitely for you.
Ahem.
My writings here always come from a really authentic place, and I hope you can see that, whether they are silly or deeper-hearted. I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching lately, and I am so excited about the plans I have for this little blog-space of mine. Thank you so much for sharing life with me here.
It is my pleasure to hostess you all here for a moment out of your day.
Today is a time for words instead of pictures.
Except, one more picture:
For me, this photo embodies my word of the year for 2012: Change.
Every year I choose a Word of the Year that I feel God has laid on my heart as the banner word over my year. I pray about it and often wrestle with the word choice, unsure of what it means or how exactly He seeks to accomplish the meaning of that word in my life. You see, often the words are not pleasant things. They are usually words like 2011’s Discipline or 2012’s word: Change.
On the heels of a rough ending to the otherwise blissfully wonderful 2011, it seemed that there was nothing BUT change left for me. God was preparing my heart. Come mid-year, I was at the end of my rope physically, spiritually, and mentally. I took six flights to visit family in two different states, fighting anxiety attacks the whole way, bursting into tears at random times and in front of strangers, feeling unequivocally beaten down. I made the tough decision to move closer to my family and start chasing some dreams.
I wish this post were about the healing I’ve experienced, the turning point for wholeness I embraced this year. But as I’ve often said, a testimony is no good without honesty and authenticity. My heart isn’t healed, much as I hate to admit that, because it’s been a year. A tough one.
I know we serve a God whose provisions are complete. He is utterly dependable and overwhelmingly in love with us. And no matter how much love we may lose on this here broken ground, our God in the Heavens never fails.
That photo above? That’s me, standing in front of Niagara Falls, during my move. I used to think it was strange that I decided to turn my back on the falls and look out the other way. Why didn’t I face the falls? Now, I think it’s mighty symbolic. My back is to the falls. My back is to the difficulty, to the mighty rushing river cliff of heartbreak. A year into it.
***
I’ll see you next January to check in on my word for 2013 and how God used it in my life.
Oh, and one of my blog-friends asked me about my goals for the upcoming year. I have a list, but I’ll share my big one: Get my poetry published!
My heart is heavy with the news of this school shooting in my beloved New England. The violence in our world can feel overwhelming. The sadness and hurt that we encounter in this fallen world can feel impossibly weighty. In light of this, I was thinking of the above words to the old, old song, “Down to the River to Pray“. And while my heart has been in prayer for the families of all involved, these words encouraged me to write to you. Sisters, let’s get on our knees, and be a nation and a generation crying out to God. He has overcome, He will overcome, and we shall see Him again. In the meantime, I pray that the message of Christmas, the meaning of this time of year, might fill the hearts of those so desperately in need this Christmastide. I pray that it might be louder than any message of hate or anger in their hearts, and that they might know that You, Lord, keep all of our tears, and listen to the cries of your people. You are ever-near, even in times of tragedy.
It’s a quiet Friday morning here–my favorite kind. I awoke late, and turned on my pretty little reading lamp. Stumbled to the kitchen, arranged a cup of tea, a buttered piece of toast, and some strawberry yogurt. Brought the meal back to the bedroom, fighting the urge to snuggle back in bed with it, and instead hunted down some museums and recipes and such online. With just the light in the corner from my little bedside lamp, it feels rather wonderfully old-fashioned in here; as though I were going to sit in the corner with my quill and write a letter, or a great American novel. Instead, I click-clack away on my laptop, creating a blog post. And now, I shall return to my bed with my second cup of tea and my book! Wake me upon lunch time should I snooze 😉
(I am currently reading The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency series, which I have been completely enamored with since I saw the HBO series a year or two ago. I have since bought the DVDs and the books, and turned many people into fans of the series. It is only too bad it seems to be on an interminable hiatus 🙁 I HIGHLY recommend it! Go get it now. It is so soothing, and beautiful, truly being filmed in Botswana. Let me know if you want more details!)
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